Recognising an abusive relationship
Abuse can be physical, sexual, psychological or emotional, and can include controlling behaviour. It is never the fault of the person who experiences it.
Violence in relationships takes many forms and does not always leave visible marks. It is common — it affects around one woman in three — and it is often hard to name, especially when it comes from someone we say we love.
How to ask for help. You can talk to a national anti-violence line, an anti-violence centre or someone you trust. You do not need to be certain or to have proof: asking for help is a choice and commits you to nothing.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Coercive control
A pattern of control — isolation, surveillance, control over spending and movements, threats, gaslighting — is abuse even without physical violence.
Coercive control is a set of behaviours that, repeated over time, limit a person's freedom and autonomy. In many countries it is recognised as a form of abuse in its own right.
How to ask for help. A helpline or an anti-violence centre can help you make sense of what you are living and weigh the possible steps, in confidence.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Stalking
Repeated, unwanted attention that creates fear. In many countries it is a crime.
Stalking is made of insistent, unwanted contact, messages or behaviour, often from an ex-partner. Keeping evidence — messages, dates, witnesses — can help with a possible report.
How to ask for help. You can turn to the police and to an anti-violence line. Noting what happens and keeping evidence is useful; you do not have to face it alone.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Sexual violence and consent
Any sexual act without consent is violence. It is never the fault of the person who experiences it.
Consent is free, informed and revocable, and it is not possible where the freedom to choose is missing. After an assault, some health steps are time-sensitive (emergency contraception, preventing infections); support, however, has no time limit.
How to ask for help. Health services and anti-violence centres can help you, even just to understand your options. You can ask for help at any time, including long afterwards.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Child abuse and protecting children
Abuse of a minor can be physical, sexual, emotional or neglect. Acting on a concern is the right thing to do.
It concerns people under 18 and does not always leave clear signs. If you have a doubt, reporting it to the relevant services is the right choice: you do not need to be certain.
How to ask for help. You can turn to child services, health services or the police. If a child is in immediate danger, call the emergency number.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Economic abuse
Controlling a person's money, work and resources is a form of coercive control.
It can mean controlling spending or wages, running up debt in the other person's name, or preventing them from working. It limits autonomy and often intertwines with other forms of abuse.
How to ask for help. An anti-violence centre can offer a listening ear and practical guidance too, without judging your situation.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Getting to safety (a safety plan)
Small, practical steps to be safer, which anti-violence services help you build.
A safety plan gathers concrete measures shaped around your situation. Leaving can be the most delicate moment: preparing it with people who have experience helps reduce the risks.
How to ask for help. A helpline or an anti-violence centre can help you build a plan tailored to you, in confidence.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Who to turn to
Emergency services, the national anti-violence line, anti-violence centres, health services and people you trust.
In immediate danger, the emergency number. To talk, get your bearings or build a plan, the national anti-violence line and local centres. The findahelpline directory lists services country by country.
How to ask for help. You'll find your country's emergency number and national line in the box at the top of this page.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.
Supporting someone who is experiencing violence
Believe them, listen without judging, don't force the decision to leave, and point them to specialist support.
Someone experiencing violence needs, above all, to be believed and heard. The decision about what to do belongs to that person; the most helpful thing you can do is stay present and point to specialist services.
How to ask for help. You can learn from an anti-violence line how best to support, without taking the person's choices out of their hands.
In immediate danger, use the emergency number at the top of the page.